Feel It All: A Therapist’s Guide to Reimagining Your Relationship with Sex

A groundbreaking guide to sexuality that dispels the stale cultural attitudes about sex that leave too many feeling inadequate, and offers an expansive, attachment-based framework to free us and develop bolder, more satisfying relationships with our sexual selves.When it comes to sex, most people feel insecure. But it’s not because we’re deficient; it’s because we’ve been under-resourced and miseducated. Certified sex therapist Casey Tanner argues that our sex lives are a microcosm of every untruth we’ve internalized about gender, sex, relationships, our bodies, and ourselves. Most of us were taught that healthy sexuality is only for a certain kind of person, in a certain kind of relationship, with a certain kind of body. As a result, the way we’ve learned how to define “good sex” is reflective of how good, worthy, and loveable we see ourselves.Feel It All is a comprehensive guide to help everyone uncover their personal misconceptions about sexuality and relationships. Tanner helps you recognize and assess your core beliefs surrounding relationships, sexuality, gender, and more; identify past trauma; find pathways to healing that work for you; and redefine sex based on knowledge and possibilities, rather than potential consequences.Comprehensive yet accessible, informative, warm, and nonjudgmental, Feel It All provides a pathway for personal healing, creating stronger relationships, and achieving deeper intimacy.This compassionate, trauma-informed guide offers a new path forward:Secure Sexuality: Move beyond performance anxiety and cultural "shoulds." Learn what good sex means for you, on your own terms, regardless of your body or relationship status.Attachment Theory Explained: Understand how your earliest relationships shape your current patterns in intimacy and sex, and learn how to build healthier connections.Healing from Miseducation: Unpack the harmful, fear-based messages you’ve received about your body, gender, and relationships from purity culture and inadequate sex ed.A Trauma-Informed Approach: Gently identify past wounds that impact your sex life and discover pathways to healing that honor your body’s story.Tools for Self-Compassion: Replace self-blame with a warm, nonjudgmental voice that allows for deeper intimacy with yourself and others. Read more